Let's go back, once again. I apologize for the back and forth, but as soon as I finish one entry I remember so much more that led to that entry that I feel I must explain. Ok, I want to explain. You get it, right?
Lennon's first year at Monarch Academy For Young Children didn't "just happen". I enrolled him when he was 2 years old, twice a week, while he was still receiving Regional Center Services. I knew that once he turned 3 years old he would transition out of the Early Start Program, but I didn't know what our next step would be. Protocol is to have assessments done as well as meetings with Regional Center to discuss our next move. Children either transition out (no further services needed), transition to Special Education Services with an IEP (Individual Education Plan) or continue with Regional Center Services as well as Special Education Services, (with a qualifying developmental disability). You can read more about that here.
When Lennon turned 3 he was transitioned to Special Education Services. And this meant he would be transferring to a Special Education Classroom for preschool, even though he was already enrolled at Monarch Academy. You could see my dilemma can't you? I needed more information before I made the decision on whether or not to take him out of Monarch.
The problem was that Lennon's birthday is on New Years Eve and the district shuts down for the holidays. So our meetings all took place prior to the holiday break with the explanation and expectation (on their part) that once the district reopened Lennon would join the special day classroom mid-year. This meant that I had the entire holiday break to ponder over what decision to make. I had a lot of questions, naturally. I knew how Monarch ran, but was completely oblivious to how a traditional special education classroom ran. I had no idea who the teacher would be and this meant that I couldn't get to know her prior to dropping Lennon off on his 1st day. That didn't sit well with me. I was told that I would be getting a call from the teacher over the break to discuss the new year and I planned on asking all my questions then.
Over the break I did get a call from the teacher and when I asked about drop off and pick up procedures I was told that I would be expected to drop Lennon off in front of the school and not only would I not "be allowed" to walk him to class, I would "not allowed" to stay with him in class. I expressed my concerns and stated that he is only 3 years old, it's his 1st time going to preschool and if he's not ok I will walk him to class. Her response? "He's a big boy, he'll be fine". I still angry laugh at that response today. When I made my concerns even clearer and asked to meet with her before school started so I could know who I was expected to leave my child with she said, "I can't meet with you before school starts, but I'll only have about 5-10 minutes between classes to meet with you". That was the last straw for me. She could hear the frustration in my tone, I'm sure, so she did her best to extinguish the now fueled conversation by saying she would mail me the details of the class and if I had any further concerns after I read through the paperwork to please call her back.
And that is how it was left. I felt angry. And confused. I talked about it with everyone I knew. I didn't know what to do. I was never the parent who just dropped off her child and walked away. Wasn't my style. Still isn't. So what... Was I supposed to turn down services? In a world where children with special needs may not be getting the services they need did I dare say thank you, but no thank you? Did I sign that paper that says I "refused services" and keep him in a private preschool? Well, the answer was yes. I picked the school where we were all already so comfortable and where I knew and trusted the teachers. I picked Monarch. I felt so strongly that I would not just leave my child at the front of a school where he would be left to walk to class all by himself with a group of kids he didn't know and a teacher I had never met that I was willing to say no to a special education classroom. He was 3 years old, (still a baby) and I put his emotional needs first.
Sunday, January 25, 2015
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Crying, Waiting, Hoping
The 2011/2012 school year was an eventful year and a year that became both a stepping stone and a catalyst for Anabelle and Lennon.
For each classroom at their preschool there are two teachers. The lead teacher in Lennon's class was also Anabelle's teacher her 1st year so I was pleased to see that Lennon would have the same experience. The assistant was a new teacher, but I could tell right away that she loved what she did and had a genuinely kind heart.
As the year progressed I noticed a disconnect in the lead teacher and the moment I felt the need to say something to the Director of the school was the exact same moment the assistant was promoted to the lead. It was a move that I fully supported and one that forever changed our experience at Monarch - in a positive impactful way. The new lead teacher and I kept in constant communication about Lennon's progress with his speech and I even emailed them the report from his sessions as well as the assessments that were done by the therapists. It was important that we were all on the same page as to what he needed.
Anabelle was in a classroom with a teacher who was amazing and truly got her. I strongly believe that year was the one that jumpstarted her developmental growth into a whole new level. One developmental milestone in particular that we had trouble with was potty training. And while Anabelle was doing well with pee it took her longer with poop. She reached that milestone her Pre-K year. She turned 5 that year and it was the 1st year she had requested a birthday party - theme and all. Prior to then I would throw small parties for her based upon what I knew she loved, but she had never actually made specific requests. For her 5th birthday she wanted a super hero party; and she wanted to dress up as Bat Girl. And it was awesome.
Adjusting to a family of 5 with an infant, 2 children in preschool part time, weekly speech therapy sessions and trying to earn extra money was tough, but I felt like we were managing, (I am pretty sure I was, thanks to my Placenta Encapsulation Pills). Anabelle had her struggles with school subjects and social skills and Lennon struggled with his communication, however I was learning and watching and trying my best to help them. It was difficult to manage without feeling like I was compromising my parenting of the other 2 while focusing on the one, but I imagine every parent with multiple children feels that at one time or another... right? I do remember thinking that I desperately wanted to fast forward Anabelle and Lennon's growth so Tiger would have older siblings to talk to and play with. I was also desperate to not have a 3rd child with developmental concerns. Was there anything I could do? I still remember random people making random comments like, "oh how nice it must have been for Lennon to have an older sibling to talk to and play with" and all I wanted to say back was, "well, actually it wasn't like that because his older sister was delayed and only tandem played". Instead I said nothing and just secretly hoped that Tiger would have that as he grew up.
The 2011/2012 school year was a good one and I felt hopeful for a positive gain from there. And then summer arrived and without the financial capabilities to continue, school came to an end. We were at the peak of getting what we needed and we slowly, but surely began to plummet. I kept Lennon in speech based upon approved authorization requests, (in writing might I add) and then Anthem Blue Cross (shame on you!) denied all claims. Which was totally awesome because I totally had thousands of dollars laying around to pay for those sessions, (can you sense my angry sarcasm?).
Unfortunately our need to try to make ends meet overshadowed much of everything else that summer. Eric had a full time job and I was able to pick up some part time work, but we still found ourselves drowning in debt. We were fortunate, however, to have family who was willing and able to help. I will forever be grateful to our family for their help and support. Whether it was with babysitting, helping us financially or just by being there. We are definitely rich with love and support.
The summer of 2012 proved to be incredibly difficult and when it came time to go back to school the following fall I could see just how much it had truly affected Lennon. The break in his schedule, routine and school structure hindered his developmental growth and caused him to need more.
Anabelle won the lottery, literally, and got into the local charter school I was desperate for her to go to for Kindergarten and I re-enrolled Lennon 3 days/week at Monarch. And it was the fall of 2012 and the events thereafter that catapulted me into being the advocate my children needed me to be. There is still a lot to explain between then and now, and I will blog all about it, but I feel it's important to mark this time frame as the catalyst to where we are today.
For each classroom at their preschool there are two teachers. The lead teacher in Lennon's class was also Anabelle's teacher her 1st year so I was pleased to see that Lennon would have the same experience. The assistant was a new teacher, but I could tell right away that she loved what she did and had a genuinely kind heart.
As the year progressed I noticed a disconnect in the lead teacher and the moment I felt the need to say something to the Director of the school was the exact same moment the assistant was promoted to the lead. It was a move that I fully supported and one that forever changed our experience at Monarch - in a positive impactful way. The new lead teacher and I kept in constant communication about Lennon's progress with his speech and I even emailed them the report from his sessions as well as the assessments that were done by the therapists. It was important that we were all on the same page as to what he needed.
Anabelle was in a classroom with a teacher who was amazing and truly got her. I strongly believe that year was the one that jumpstarted her developmental growth into a whole new level. One developmental milestone in particular that we had trouble with was potty training. And while Anabelle was doing well with pee it took her longer with poop. She reached that milestone her Pre-K year. She turned 5 that year and it was the 1st year she had requested a birthday party - theme and all. Prior to then I would throw small parties for her based upon what I knew she loved, but she had never actually made specific requests. For her 5th birthday she wanted a super hero party; and she wanted to dress up as Bat Girl. And it was awesome.
My Bat Girl at Superhero Headquarters
(she picked the outfit - pink boots and all - by herself)
Adjusting to a family of 5 with an infant, 2 children in preschool part time, weekly speech therapy sessions and trying to earn extra money was tough, but I felt like we were managing, (I am pretty sure I was, thanks to my Placenta Encapsulation Pills). Anabelle had her struggles with school subjects and social skills and Lennon struggled with his communication, however I was learning and watching and trying my best to help them. It was difficult to manage without feeling like I was compromising my parenting of the other 2 while focusing on the one, but I imagine every parent with multiple children feels that at one time or another... right? I do remember thinking that I desperately wanted to fast forward Anabelle and Lennon's growth so Tiger would have older siblings to talk to and play with. I was also desperate to not have a 3rd child with developmental concerns. Was there anything I could do? I still remember random people making random comments like, "oh how nice it must have been for Lennon to have an older sibling to talk to and play with" and all I wanted to say back was, "well, actually it wasn't like that because his older sister was delayed and only tandem played". Instead I said nothing and just secretly hoped that Tiger would have that as he grew up.
The 2011/2012 school year was a good one and I felt hopeful for a positive gain from there. And then summer arrived and without the financial capabilities to continue, school came to an end. We were at the peak of getting what we needed and we slowly, but surely began to plummet. I kept Lennon in speech based upon approved authorization requests, (in writing might I add) and then Anthem Blue Cross (shame on you!) denied all claims. Which was totally awesome because I totally had thousands of dollars laying around to pay for those sessions, (can you sense my angry sarcasm?).
Unfortunately our need to try to make ends meet overshadowed much of everything else that summer. Eric had a full time job and I was able to pick up some part time work, but we still found ourselves drowning in debt. We were fortunate, however, to have family who was willing and able to help. I will forever be grateful to our family for their help and support. Whether it was with babysitting, helping us financially or just by being there. We are definitely rich with love and support.
The summer of 2012 proved to be incredibly difficult and when it came time to go back to school the following fall I could see just how much it had truly affected Lennon. The break in his schedule, routine and school structure hindered his developmental growth and caused him to need more.
Anabelle won the lottery, literally, and got into the local charter school I was desperate for her to go to for Kindergarten and I re-enrolled Lennon 3 days/week at Monarch. And it was the fall of 2012 and the events thereafter that catapulted me into being the advocate my children needed me to be. There is still a lot to explain between then and now, and I will blog all about it, but I feel it's important to mark this time frame as the catalyst to where we are today.
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